WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN AKRON?!?!

Remember this story I linked to about the 52-year-old stripper in Akron who got jumped by one of her co-workers? Looking for a story from the complete opposite end of the spectrum? Have I got a deal for you!

AKRON -- Police say a 14-year-old girl was dancing topless at an Akron strip club when they raided the bar and arrested four exotic dancers.

The girl has been placed in protective custody. . . .

Police Lt. Rick Edwards says officers saw some dancers have contact with customers, but not the 14-year-old. He says the club is not licensed as a sexually oriented business.

The girl has been placed with Summit County Children Services.

Ahem.

ATTENTION, STRIP-CLUB OWNERS OF AKRON, OHIO: THE APPROPRIATE AGE FOR A STRIPPER IS EIGHTEEN (18) TO THIRTY-FIVE (35). THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO REASON TO FEATURE ANY EXOTIC DANCERS WHO FALL OUTSIDE THAT AGE RANGE. IT CAN ONLY LEAD TO LEGAL PROBLEMS, PHYSICAL HARM, AND/OR PUBLIC HUMILIATION. REPEAT: EXOTIC DANCERS SHOULD BE AGED 18 TO 35. NO EXCEPTIONS. THANK YOU.

OK, I'm done now.

(Hat tip: With Leather.)